April, 2013

• 30 April

  Obama on Jason Collins: “I’m 7 Foot Tall and Can Bang with Shaq”

  

  Call it another case of poor phrasing. In a press conference today, President Obama was asked about Jason Collins, the NBA center who recently announced that he is gay. In a bizarre response, with some …
• 28 April

  Hank Johnson Imagines a World Without Balloons, We Pay Tribute

  

  Hank Johnson is the most gifted orator in the universe. Last Thursday, the Democratic Congressman from Georgia raised an extremely important topic on the House floor: ensuring universal access to helium. In a pun-fueled diatribe, …
• 22 April

  Anthony Weiner Rises Again, Takes Another Stab at Twitter

  

  You gotta admit it: this guy’s got balls. Today, Anthony Weiner erected a new Twitter account, and boy are we flush with excitement. Just two years after the former Congressman from New York got caught …
• 17 April

  David Sirota’s Twitter Pic Spawns Humorous #Siroting Meme

  

  You can say many things about Salon’s David Sirota: he can get worked up during a debate, he has a problem with white people, and he seems to write about douchebaggery from a position of …
• 8 April

  5 Tons of Nutella Stolen, 10 Possible Uses

  

  Over the weekend, thieves in the German town of Bad Hersfeld stole 7 pallets of Nutella jars from a semi-parked trailer. Weighing in at approximately 5 tons, the creamy loot is valued at over $20,000. While …
• 1 April

  President Obama Shooting Baskets, Breaking Promises

  

  On April 1st, 2013, President Barack Obama was joined by more than 30,000 guests for the 135th annual White House Easter Egg Roll. The holiday festivities included the eponymous egg rolling competition, an obstacle course …